It’s comical, but the reality is everyone in 2021 is reviewing everything under the sun. I thought I’d hop on that train and as a new mom, ride the well traveled review route. In this blog I’ll be writing about the expectations I had verses the outcomes, debunked wives tales, pure baby ownership truths and a short list of humorous new mom facts. Let’s get into it –  because I only have 30 more minutes before another baby meltdown… Who am I kidding? This short post will take me several days to write – baby Elizabeth lets me have a few minutes a day to myself (sometimes). 🙂

New Mom Reviews

Labor & Deliver

     For 8 months I prepared myself for motherhood. I watched numerous videos, read blogs and asked many questions on the broad topic of ‘what to expect when your expecting.’ Without a crystal ball however, I could never prepare for reality. I expected to have a natural birth – the one where your ‘water breaks,’ you then dilate, you push and then you have a new beautiful baby. Instead, I was rushed to the hospital at 37 weeks for high blood pressure and liver failure. After the doctors were able to control my blood pressure, I was able to get induced naturally. Although my water broke and I had contractions, my body was not dilating. After 48 my doctor gave me 3 options: 1. Continue induction 2. Schedule an immediate c-sction 3. Have an emergency c-section in 3 to 4 hours. I chose to not have anymore ’emergencies’ and opted to schedule an immediate c-section. – something I was not prepared for at all. I never would have thought to prepare for a major surgery like this. i should have taken a page from the Boy Scouts and “always be prepared.”

Breastfeeding

   I cannot believe it has been a month already – because it feels more like 18 years have passed! I have mourned over things I did not expect to mourn over and had the weirdest epiphanies I could ever dream of (or have nightmares about). The very first thing I mourned over was breastfeeding. I always had the notion that if the baby is hungry enough they will find their food, this was not as  easy as I thought. Apparently it is a science,  it is as hard as getting pregnant on purpose. Because it was so hard I tried to pump and that came with its own challenges too. In order to keep the milk production at adequate feeding levels, you have to pump your breasts every 2 to 3 hours. Who has time for that? Especially when you have a newborn screaming for attention around the clock. Unfortunately, that is exactly what played out – not even a month after having baby Elizabeth I can no longer produce milk. I cried for days.

Sleeping

     Another thing I had expectations about was sleep or the lack there of. I honestly thought people were lying to me about the lack of sleep due to having a baby. Well I am here to tell you that this is true. Babies need to fed around the clock – even throughout the night. The first couple weeks you will have to feed them 2 to 3 ounces every 2 hours and by 1 month you should be feeding them 4 ounces every 3 to 4 hours. It is rough because you also are changing diapers all the time, burping, consoling and trying to take care of yourself as well. I am beyond exhausted and the way I remedy this is to abandon my own responsibilities, hygiene and chores. I also try to sleep or nap when the baby sleeps.

Proven or Debunked Wives Tales

Boys Sit High & Girls Sit Low

Proven.

The entire pregnancy Elizabeth sat so high on me that no one knew I was pregnant until month 8/9 – and even then I was told I didn’t look pregnant until I turned to my side.

Pregnancy Heartburn is Caused by a Baby that has Hair on its Head in Utero 

Proven.

At 37 weeks Elizabeth was born with a full thick head of hair. I never had one day of relief from intense heartburn. The condition would wake me up at night and keep me up until late morning.

Sweet Cravings Depicts Girl 

Proven. 

I had been mostly sugar-free for over 10 years. Around month 5 or 6 of the pregnancy I craved Coca-Cola daily. I had to cut myself off cold turkey because I knew all this sugar was not healthy for the growth of a baby. I was also worried about the babies health – it was very difficult to stop the sugar.

Baby Ownership Truths

  1. You will never sleep the way you did pre-pregnancy
  2. Diaper “BLOWOUTS” are real
  3. First few diapers will have paper-like black poop
  4. Babies cry, scream, eat and poop a lot
  5. Babies sleep less so you can too
  6. Babies look like their daddy’s first
  7. Pacifiers are a lifesaver
  8. Swaddles are a great way to make your baby ‘chill out’
  9. A warm bottle is a magic trick to get fussy babies to sleep
  10. If you gave birth to a baby with a full head of hair, you most certainly had major heartburn during your pregnancy

New Mom Facts

  1. Being a mom is REALLY hard
  2. You will make many personal sacrifices – prepare to miss many meals along with sleep
  3. You can’t keep track of time and you’ll never know what day it is
  4. You are super fertile after having a baby – BECAREFUL!
  5. Hormones are still raging
  6. Hair, nails & skin are beautiful after labor
  7. Breastfeeding is super difficult
  8. Pumping is hard to find time for
  9. Keeping your emotions in check is REALLY hard
  10. It took me 2 days to write this – It is now 10:52pst
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